At the twilight

For some reasons, I find old couples very very adorable. Just the site of them holding each others hand comes at par to any dove pair in an Archies gallery. And why do I find them so fascinating? Well… for several reasons – for me, they show that love actually exists, else why would they have spent so many years together and still stand with each other. Even if the faces are all wrinkles and waist size has gone out of proportion and the scalp is bald and the skin of palm has become so dry that it doesn’t even hold the sensation any more.. but still, the hands are intertwined together. What else could it be, if not love?

After all, they too would have faced those periodic cycles, when the face of the person sleeping beside them sometimes appears to the most lovable and sometimes the most miserable. And they too would have lived up to those moments when one of them feels that they are not genuinely loved or understood or respected. When the wives would have caught their husbands drooling over some other lady… or when the husbands would have felt that so much time has gone in vain and yet the lady never understood his true self. They too would have faced all of it.. but the best part is they lived through it!

Its not that all elderly couples excite me… especially, when you are an Indian… it doesn’t even more so. Since, we do not believe in breaking marriages even if somewhere we strongly believe that the person we are with is not the one, we should be with. Still. Families, society and largely our own self keeps pulling ourselves away from the thought of separation… and you keep telling yourself that everyone is good, you just need to adjust. And eventually, the two people get so much used to of each others presence that things become manageable. But I would not call it love… because in loads and loads of these couples, I do not see that spark I was talking about in the beginning of this post.

Wives generally get busy with the upbringing of kids and husbands get busy with the arrangement of resources for the family. The two become three-four-five etc etc and the life becomes a journey of accomplishing responsibilities. I am not talking about those elderly couples, who did not even realize the charm of getting old together. The ones, who take separate rooms and separate beds and separate ways to keep themselves busy after they are 45 or 50. The ones, who are always indulged in the competition of proving who’s been a better spouse or who should have been given more credit of running their still ongoing married life.

I am talking about the ones, who even at the twilight of their lives share some giggles and jokes and pull each others legs. Where the wives are never too old to be complimented about their beauty and the husbands are never too sober to be decked up well, when the two go out for an evening walk. The couples, who still want to spend time together alone.. and who do not shy away in telling each other how their life is incomplete without their counterpart… the couples with grey hair but red heart…the couples, who could not go to bed without each other… irrespective of just anything in the world.

May be my imagination is too flowery.. but I am sure, there will be such people.. even if they could be counted on fingertips. There will be people who succeed in saving their lives from getting sacrificed in the daily boredom… who never get enough of each others company… who still relish each others touch and who irrespective of what their age is or how many years they have been together.. still feel fresh and rejuvenated with the sight or the voice of their husband or the wife.

28 thoughts on “At the twilight

  1. Neal, i have enjoyed reading your article. Like you, i love the sight of a happy old couple. A happy old couple teaches me so much about life, about love and about values. Yet at the same time sight of a happy old couple is a very sad reminder to me because a number of us don’t have the privilege of having older people in our lives due to wars among others. Thanks for writing this.

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  2. My happy older couple was my parents. They held hands, joked around all the time. Mom always greeted Dad with a kiss whenever he came home. Dad’s gone, now, but I’ll always have the memories of seeing true love.

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  3. This post is truly stunning, for the way you portrayed love. This kind of love is rare to see these days, where people have forgotten what compromise and forgiveness is. Spontaneous reactions out of anger in the present has spoilt so many relationships. This idea of growing old together should really inspire the people of this fast paced world to slow down and make efforts to hold that love close to their heart.

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    1. It’s all about Choices Niharika. Earlier people were content and made great efforts to salvage their relationships. That spark is lost now. Patience is the key and it does hold no ground in today’s reality.

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  4. I love this! Not sure if you know who Miranda Lambert is– She’s a country singer, but she has this one song called “Automatic” basically singing about how the old ways are still the best ways.

    And reading your article reminded me of this song. As part of her lyrics, she sings “If you had something to say, you’d write it on a piece of paper and then put a stamp on it, then they’d get it three days later. Boys would call the girls, and girls would turn them down. Staying married was the only way to work your problems out”…
    Older couples grew up in a period where they would work their problems out. Not get divorced. Not cheat. I mean, of course they are the exceptions. But for the most part…older couples are patient with each other. I, too, get so happy when I see an older couple holding hands. It truly is a wonderful sight.
    Very good read!

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    1. Nope, never heard of her. I loved the lyrics and it gels very well to the situation. Nothing is more beautiful than the love that has weathered the storms of life.

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  5. Good one… Love is palpable between couples if it’s true.. It comes across as warmth, a genuine caring and happiness, not like the over the top PDA, youngsters do now..

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    1. Well said. If people are going to be allowed to say “we love you” and “I love you”, they’d better have the backbone to prove it. Love isn’t just a word.

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      1. Oh yes i agree. Love was a commitment for me till I saw nobody ever meant it when they said it back to me. So I stopped believing in love

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  6. I have read this post twice now, and just love it, my Grandparents had a wonderful marriage, they were the old couple you would find sitting on a bench at the coast, sharing chips and laughing…it’s my one goal with my husband, to keep that love and humour 🙂

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  7. This is so sweet. I hope to find this kind of love one day. Whenever I see an older couple walking hand and hand, I always try to sneak a picture. I find the image inspiring.

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  8. There is an inexpressible and unique satisfaction and akin to the zephyrs of wintery days riots through my veins,I never confessed it,but yes,your writings do have that unique touch which gives it that exuberant touch,Keep it up.You are and will be more praised and loved by readers all over the globe one day.

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    1. Wow this is just… I don’t know what to say..the love, the warmth that you have poured would be cherished forever. Never I have encountered such sweet passage of praise towards me and this will always be special, always.

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  9. Gorgeous photo and beautiful words Neal – I can relate, some marriages are like wine – they are a little rough at the start but with time mellow into the most beautiful wine – deep and full of laughter and strength. Mine is anyway so I’m lucky ☺️

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  10. Like, double like and love this one, Neal. A lot of thoughtful lines very well expressed. When the younger generation of men focus their thoughts on the hour glass figure and the women are too busy fussing over empowerment, it is heartening to know that there are people who can catch the glint of true love in an older couple and appreciate it.

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    1. “When the younger generation of men focus their thoughts on the hour glass figure and the women are too busy fussing over empowerment”

      Lol ! You won’t stop being sarcastic to these disillusioned heads, won’t you Pranitha? 😛

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